Sorry to disappoint those who thought I was going to start swinging or something crazy like that.
*(Audible sigh of relief from Derek)*
As usual, I'm talking about food (what else?) So, rather than easy-sleazy, I'm talking 'easy like a Sunday morning.'
*(Audible sigh of relief from Derek)*
As usual, I'm talking about food (what else?) So, rather than easy-sleazy, I'm talking 'easy like a Sunday morning.'
For people who know me in real life on any given non-vacay day, they know that 'easy' is not the word used to describe me in a restaurant. "High maintenance" would probably be more appropriate. I may be responsible for more restaurant-servers taking their own lives than anyone else on the planet. In addition, I ingest at least a gallon a year of spit from the kitchen staff in response to all of my 'special requests'. The one plus: Think of all of the great antibody exposure I get!
However, there is a dark side to all of this: it's boring. It makes me feel cheated. It's unsatisfying. It makes my dining companions squirm and sink deep down into their chairs. Dare I say it's embarrassing?
If I hear myself utter any of the following phrases one more time I think I just might scream:
However, there is a dark side to all of this: it's boring. It makes me feel cheated. It's unsatisfying. It makes my dining companions squirm and sink deep down into their chairs. Dare I say it's embarrassing?
If I hear myself utter any of the following phrases one more time I think I just might scream:
- No butter/oil/cream
- No gravies or sauces
- If the chef must include gravies or sauces- please put them on the side where I can ignore them or simply fork-dip (roughly the same thing.)
- No cheese, sour cream or other toppings that contain calories (or flavor).
- No pasta
- No rice
I know that the bullet points above seem like they could have jumped out at you from one of any of the popular health magazines: Oxygen, Clean Eating, Shape, Fitness. And they are good diet 'tricks' to keep calories as low as possible. But I'm ready to turn that trick (!) and 'be easy' (!) instead. Let me explain.
Rather than "no butter, oil, sauce, toppings, flavor", I am asking for EASY (aka 'light') "butter, oil, etc." And if there is cheese or some other naughty food item, I ask for it 'easy' too...if I remember. Sometimes I don't, and that's OK too.
I have found that when I had a small amount of some evil food in question, I am more satisfied than if I had lettuce leaves with a teaspoon of dressing and some fat-free protein. The spreads, sauces or other previously off-limits items increase the enjoyment factor by about 10 or 100, depending. Consequently, I get more satiated and am not in dire need of a dessert or snack so soon, if at all. Sometimes I can go all afternoon and not get hungry again, which is all at once unknown and shocking to me.
Oh, I'm not fooled into thinking that this is all for free. The caloric ramifications are still very real. I'm just hoping that the calories will balance out by reducing extra cravings.
Even though I've only been doing this for a few weeks, it seems to be successful as long as I really listen to what my body and soul want and not what my mind thinks my body wants. You do realize that these forces are often diametrically opposed to one another, right? So far my weight and calories are stable. Whew.
If I continue to eat this way, I'd be happy to simply maintain my weight, as long as I can truly eat what I want like my friend Charlotte, and feel more normal. I suppose that in some way, it comes down to how much suffering I'm willing to do for those last 'vanity pounds.' On that subject, check out this old post about the last ten pounds- I love all of the thoughtful comments that readers took the time to leave.
Even though I've only been doing this for a few weeks, it seems to be successful as long as I really listen to what my body and soul want and not what my mind thinks my body wants. You do realize that these forces are often diametrically opposed to one another, right? So far my weight and calories are stable. Whew.
If I continue to eat this way, I'd be happy to simply maintain my weight, as long as I can truly eat what I want like my friend Charlotte, and feel more normal. I suppose that in some way, it comes down to how much suffering I'm willing to do for those last 'vanity pounds.' On that subject, check out this old post about the last ten pounds- I love all of the thoughtful comments that readers took the time to leave.
Here's an example: When I was on my way to Canada last week, an unforeseen delay forced me to search for dinner at Calgary Airport. (As per usual, I had packed and consumed my lunch on the first plane). At Jugo Juice, I did something unprecedented: I ordered a grilled cheesy veggie flatbread rather than a protein-rich, cheeseless, plain flatbread. It kept me full for hours - many more hours than I expected for a non-protein-heavy meal. And it was nice to feel 'normal' for a change.
True, I still want to lose a few pounds that I gained on my recent vacay, but not at the expense of losing my mind.
True, I still want to lose a few pounds that I gained on my recent vacay, but not at the expense of losing my mind.
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| The Jugo Juice Grilled Veggie Flatbread saved my bacon in Calgary (Did you catch the fact that this is a recycled photo from January when it was freezing and people were wearing jackets? Good job, astute readers!) |
When I got back home, I continued my 'easy' experiment and this time I had a witness: The Supermodel otherwise known as the Idaho Blender Queen: Allie from Pimp My Protein Shake
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| Allie! |
We managed to eat our way around the Coachella desert. Native Foods is a must-go for vegans and carnivores alike. The flavors are so amazing, you won't miss the beef. Promise! Want to try seitan, tempeh, tofu and be guaranteed to actually like it? They have other restaurants throughout Southern California.
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| Black is the new um, black. Not surprisingly for those who know me, dinner was spent at the best restaurant in the Coachella Valley, bar none: Johannes Restaurant . **Note: this is looking like a repeat of another weekend with another fabulous blogger, Tiffany of Carbzilla fame.** |
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Perusing the aisles at the best healthfood store in the world, Clark's Nutrition |
To mix it up a bit, we managed a picnic atop Mt. San Jacinto...Poor Allie was ready to faint from low blood sugar by the time we broke out the grub. Satiety note: due to the cheese factor, even this smallish home-made grilled lavash sandwich filled me up quickly- Allie was shocked.
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| We need to eat NOWWWWW! To burn off a few cals and have a blast at the same time, we hit up Gold's Gym for a killer Body Combat Class one day and Spin (Allie) and Step (me) then next day:  |
We also managed to squeeze in an old-fashioned SnM massage courtesy of our favorite gay Korean masseuse, Chris. Shockingly (and therefore hilariously), he turns out to have kids and a girlfriend. Oops. Guess the white sweat-band was not a fashion statement, but was actually for catching sweat - who knew?!
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| Happy, relaxed, pummeled girls |
Farewell Lunch at the incomparable King's Highway at the Ace Hotel, Palm Springs:
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| Charcuterie with a side of unphotographed Burrata mozzarella (here, we made up for the lack of animal products at Native Foods) |
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| The Truffle Oil popcorn that I dream about, nightly |
My Black Bean burger was so rich and filling that I could only manage to finish half, plus a few of these off-the-hook fries. When ordering my fries, I say "burn 'em"
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| House-made black bean burger- the beans were literally falling out whole- BEAN BY BEAN. Love it. |
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| Random Kitty Cuddling photo |
Since Allie left, I have been meeting other peeps for restaurant meals and have been employing my more moderate eating tactics, with continued success. Thankfully the suicide rate in Los Angeles county has decreased dramatically. But I wonder: how will I continue to support my stellar immunity?
Q: How do you handle restaurant eating (or eating in general)? Do you eat clean no matter what? Do you let yourself eat the 'real deal' and call it good? How do you stop from feeling deprived?
Q: How do you handle restaurant eating (or eating in general)? Do you eat clean no matter what? Do you let yourself eat the 'real deal' and call it good? How do you stop from feeling deprived?
